By NEIL SCOTT “You need to forget about what you know, that’s your problem. Forget about what you think you know about life, about friendship, and especially about Mark Lawrenson.” (Tyler Durden, ‘Fight Club’) (Kind of) I’M under no illusions here. This is a...
By Sam Jones I’M pretty good at my job. Not the best in the world or anything, but I’m pretty good. A bit lazy at times, but you can work smart, can’t you? Sometimes that little bit of talent can see you through on the days when you can’t be fucked. The days when you...
LAWRO is, to all extents and purposes, a bit of a divvy There is nothing really wrong with this – some of my best friends are divvies, and we can’t all be as distinguished as your average TAW contributor. Lawro is the fella at the party who is not as funny as he...
MARK Lawrenson is SAD. Not elaborate train set in the cellar, meals for one, live with your mother until she dies and then refuse to move her body from the chair she loved so much, Alan Partridge sad. He’s not saaaaad. He’s SAD. Not grieving for a lost relative,...
CONFIDENTIAL BBC STAFF PERFORMANCE APPRAISAL Department: Sport Full name: Lawrenson, Mark Thomas ‘Lawro’ Role: Pundit. Co-commentator. PART ONE – TO BE COMPLETED BY EMPLOYEE State your understanding of your main duties and responsibilities: People said be the...
WAITING FOR LAWRO A tragicomedy in two acts By Daniel Fitzsimmons Gary Alan Martin Garth A Boy ACT ONE A swish BBC Studio. A tree. Evening. Gary, a velveteen owl-man, sits on a chair, pulling desperately at the Quasar boot on one of his feet. He gives up. Enter Alan,...
By Andi Thomas IT’S possible, of course, that we’re coming at this from the wrong direction. Mark Lawrenson, as I’ve heard people tell, used to be a footballer. Used to be quite a good footballer. Won some shiny trophies, and made some Liverpool fans...
IF you’ve ever had the dubious pleasure of working in the office of a big company the chances are you’ve done this. You’ve looked up from your own dull, banal work and focused momentarily on someone on the other side of the room. This person never does a tap. You...
By Mike Nevin FIRST of all, let me say this; Mark Lawrenson was a brilliant footballer. A brilliant, talented, committed footballer who wore the Liver Bird with absolute distinction. We noticed when his wrists went a bit limp as he galloped back into back into his own...
By Iain Macintosh LOOK, let me make one thing clear. I don’t want this to get nasty. We can all start with the best of intentions, with lofty ideals of objectivity and balance, but there’s a high risk that before long we’ll be circled around his prostrate body, boots...
