THIS is what the world looks like when everyone fucking gives up and late stage Capitalism rules supreme. Shite. The Keepeher: 8 Was really good with his feet. Like Michael Flatley. My mate got tickets for him and his wife to see Flatley on the Riverdance Tour....
THEIR manager is a fucking big cobweb head. Adrian: 9 Great save from Abraham. Loved the fella in our end telling him to make himself big and then he did. Extra five points for kneeing their lad. The only time in life you can legit knee someone in the grid....
I MEAN, McManaman is a Bluenose, isn’t he? Adrian: 8 Probably should do better with the first save in that he pads it right back to the lad for a second go, but then the second is a cracking save. The save second half is absolutely brilliant. Tremendous. What a fella....
GOODFELLAS helicopter morning, there. Woke up white-wined by the biggest removals van I’ve ever seen that unsurprisingly got stuck in the street. Beeping it’s fucking head off… Got up, went the shop, got back, started chopping stuff to marinate lamb, chopped me...
BIG Dychey there before kick off, lads have shots the suns out. Absolute Buckley Hill, him. In fairness to him, they are good at what they do. Absolute shithouses to a man. Screaming for everything, leaving one in every time. Go ‘ed lads, give it your best shot....
ARE Everton still top of the league? The Reds are just too good for pretty much every team in the world. Irresistible today. Adrian: 8 Makes a great save one on one… “He’s sound, him”. Passes it to their lad with an open goal… “Fuck me,...
OH, man – that first half! Jesus Christ. Heavy going, that. We were sound and then Milner cut his head and The Reds started acting the goat. Miles in their legs can’t have helped. Big fan of having a nervous last 10 minutes for nothing. Fucking hell… Adrian: 6 A...
IT’S the Super Cup. It’s against Chelsea, who are led by the only man in Great Britain going baldy quicker than Joe Hart. I’m a baldy spotter by trade now. Can see them hairs getting finer from a mile away. Lampard will be lashing sun cream on his scalp before you can...
HERE we are again. The summer was boss, weren’t it? Unbearable bastards everywhere sixing there head off. Spent circa 30 per cent of Glastonbury pretending to lift the European Cup. Flags all over the gaff getting pictures taken, six fingers erected all over the...
MADRID Airport. Sunday, June 2. I mean, I was up at 6.45am, not a mark on me. No hangover, no nothing. Mine was an unusual Champions League final day. Friday night, you see, got a smidgen out of hand. European Cup nerves and that, the ale flew, bevied twice in a day....