FAITH is a funny thing, isn’t it?
The Reds are the best Reds I have seen in probably my whole adult life and here I am as the team news drops, with my undies in my throat, wishing I was one of them grey fellas who liked nothing.
I mean, the team has the look of one that could get legged all over the gaff. Adam Lallana playing his first game since last year, Dan Sturridge starting his first game since Luis Suarez was banging them in or something, Divock Origi, fresh from getting flashed to all and sundry for a couple of bob, is on the bench.
But it’s fine, isn’t it? I mean Huddersfield are shite, aren’t they? But then The Reds, the reds get beat against the bottom three away from home, don’t we? That’s one of our things, isn’t it? Weirdly?
That said, I’ve just come across these words in one of my notes. It was my motivational speech to a nervous karaokeer. It’s probably going to end up on mugs and headstones all over the world:
“Believe in yourself and fucking give it bifters.”
Can someone make some T-shirts with that on it please, and sell them for me?
Alisson: 8
That kit really is wondrous. Glorious. Like a massive big wondrous vagina, with arms, that saves everything it should, and loves a touch on the ball. Venus fly trap. Fucking big pink magnet.
Joe Gomez: 8
Mad the way he has completed centre half so is just titting about at right back for a laugh. The ball to Shaqiri for the goal is the pass of the match, mind you. And there we were thinking we should have played the more attacking Trent.
Virgil: 8
That image of him with the armband, mate. Adam Melia had a vision before The Reds bought him that whoever ended up buying him would end up with him as captain lifting the league trophy. When it looked like it was Man City we were very down. When he signed for The Reds, mate. God’s plan, lad.
Degsy: 7
Was great in that he did everything he needed to, but still had the chance to buzz about like a Jack Russell for a bit. There was a Jack Russell used to live next door to me Nan’s in Fazakerley, little fucker it was, fucking couldn’t stand me nan. Mad that.
Andy Robbo: 7
Part of the defence that has literally got the greatest defensive record for the start of a season in The Reds’ history. Give them all an extra point to what I have written your own selves. Like a handicap in golf.
Henderson: 8
Thought he was really good, you know, not in a “Henderson is sound” needle way either. Hope he only has a knock, rather than something that’s gunna keep him out.
Milner: 8
Made out of fucking rock, mate. Could conceivably knock about with Deadpool there, knocking shit out of people with his granite arms.
Ad Lallana: 7
For someone who hasn’t played for two years or some shit he was sound, you know. Got a lovely half turn, hasn’t he? Forgot how good it was. Looked like he’d aged 15 years by the end of the game, mind you. Like yer man out the end of Indiana Jones who has a swig out of the jarg cup.
Mo Salah: 8
Reckon he was back to his best, yerno. Two chances, slots ones, just misses the second. Linked up well with Sturridge, his touch was great, his movement was great, he was great.
Dan Sturridge: 7
Lasted a whole game there without snapping his banjo. Thought he linked the forwards and the midfield well, looked stronger than he has for years. Well in, lad.
Shaqiri: 8
Mad little fucker played centre mid there, just stood still finding space all day. Movement for the goal is perfection. First touch for the goal is perfection. Pass for the goal is perfection. Mo literally doesn’t have to touch it. Boss.
SUBS
Gini:
Come on, looked fucked.
Firmino:
Come on played centre mid or the top of a diamond or some shit, played the worst pass I’ve ever seen, probably could have scored or set up three.
Fabinho:
Made some tackles, won some tackles. Done alright. Well in.
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I am an Egyptian Lady, will you please tell Shaquiri thank you very much on my behalf, please do
Ben Johnson… 8 for a poor half from hendo. Wijnaldum sures up the midfield in second half and looks better… no ranking. Hendo fan boy clearly
The midfield looked better in the second half because Huddersfield stopped pressing high. They gambled everything on pressing high for the first half, and once we came through that alright they sat off.
Strange, obsessed, one eyed and clueless. Is this your mission in life?
Think you need a new interest.
Yep. As always. Ben doesn’t actually watch matches.
Lovren got battered by that big shithouse they had upfront, made a load of mistakes but Ben thinks he was great.
Henderson and Lallana we’re terrible, Ben thinks they were great.
Wijnaldum and Fabinho come on and play really well, nothing positive to say about them.
Loves a shit white player does Ben.
Weird, thinly-veiled accusation of racism that last part of your writing. What’s the fact Henderson and Lallana are white got to do with anything?
A racist is the person highlighting race. So thats you pal.
Don’t know what Gino you were watching or what match. Gino was very good when he came on and the front six were not 8/10s and the like given how difficult the game was and how poorly we looked after the ball. The three points and a solid defence was all the good from that game. Move on
Thought we were shite throughout. As for Lallana, I am not his biggest fan and he did fuck all to make me change my thoughts regarding him. Feel we haven’t been missing him at any time.
Apologies but that win made me feel like we had lost. Somewhere down the line we have to start playing because this is excruciating football we are playing… We are better than this.
Good news is we are still joint top.
Just the post script to not getting how football works is we are still joint top.
Sound.
Wah wah wah.. we fucking won.. we were shit but win win win and that’s all that counts.
Today we rode our luck. We can thank an alert Lino, a ref who didn’t award what would been a harsh handball and a shot that had our goalie beat but hit the post.
The previous game we had Mahrez to thank for skying his pen.
It’s not wah, wah. It’s observation and just a statement of how it felt. But if your happy with a shite performance then knock ya self out.
Happy with the win.. thought the performance was generally poor, as stated. Ultimately its the win that is important. I agree fully that they need to get playing soon though as all this winning could turn out to be problematic.
Fucking love that were still top of the table, But other than the Gomez/Shaq/Mo play we were complete shite. We’re not gonna get by teams like Watford playing like that,and Arsenal fucking hand it to us . I miss our offense .
What’s with the attitude towards supporters who have a different perspective to you? Grow up peops ffs! Overall a solid performance at the back against a poor yet difficult opposition. I got really frustrated with the frontline today as they constantly chose wrong decisions in good positions. I’ve said it before this season Sala’s body language is lack lustre and looking at him after the game clearly all is not well as his persona was miserable as fck just can’t put a finger on it atm but puzzling. But heh, 3 points and 10 points more than same time last season and not playing well? The outlook is positive
If we’d got even half of them decisons you allude to right we’d be celebrating a comfortable win. The chances before the chance were there in plentiful moments yesterday, we were just infuriatingly, and unusually, off the boil for every potential moment of a counter attack.
If we play Lallana, he has to be in the middle three. He’s too slow to be in that trident, but his ability to play on the half turn and press the opposition is a great asset. It’s whether or not he can regain that engine he had in 16/17…
Love Ben’s optimism but those ratings bear no resemblance to reality. If Henderson deserved 8 then Shaqiri was a12. Until Gini and Fabinho paired up we had the most lack lustre midfield I seen since Henderson and Milner last clogged up the middle. Two good industrious players who have the best front three in the league ahead of them and provide them with not much. The sooner Naby and Fab are regulars together the better as their first thought is forward.
A crowd of cry-arses begging for our defense to get sorted because we score 100+ goals but let in 50 in 13/14 and have seen much the same dynamic ever since.
I’d venture that it is the same cry-arses that moan that, sure, our defense is bettered by none in the league but we’re only scoring an average of roughly two goals per game.
A wise man once shouted down from a mountain, “Joint top of the league, muthafuckas! Joint top of the league!” Those are words to take to heart.
Well said mate. Some people clearly think it’s easy turning a club in free fall into one of the most talked about football forces in the world in 3 years. In May a CL Final. End of October, joint top of league. We all know there are injuries, post World Cup dropping in form but what the fuck do all the cry arses expect? An 87/88 waltz to the title of 4-0 wins?? Wake up. More often than not our league campaign has been over by end October. Let’s ENJOY this and get behind the players who are out there and have got us to this position.
Did your Nan live in Greystone place? My Auntie had a Jack Russell. Lovely woman, mad dog.
Heard and read a lot of negativity over the last couple of days, but here is a reminder for those spreading it: a year ago we lost big at Spurs, conceding more goals in one game than we did all season this time around! Yes, we lack the fluency of last season, but we win games we didn’t for about 10 years (even earlier in 2018 we lost at Swansea, remember? Where are they now? Losing to fucking Aston Villa!). If you told me in August we would still be unbeaten in the league by the 20th of October, won 7 out of 9, conceded only 3 and would be joint leaders with City I probably bit your hand off! It’s not all doom and gloom, lads and ladies!
But there is still room for a lot of improvement. And maybe Ben got it a bit too positive with his ratings this week in what was, let’s be honest, a pretty avarage game to our standards. Some 8’s en 7’s should have sounded better as a 6 (or even a 5). There were only two and a half standouts for me on Saturday:
Joe Gomez: our player of the season so far! On the right, in the middle: he seems to be better week in week out. If Virgil van Dijk gets a lot of praise for our defensive record over the last year (and rightly so!), Gomez is as important in this team only conceding three goals so far.
Xherdan Shaqiri: maybe the biggest problem in this team lacking the fluency from last season is the lack of creativity from midfield. We have a lot of big runners and hard workers with a lot of heart, but with missing Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain, waiting for Adam Lallana to get back to his real form and Naby Keïta still adapting to the PL, we lack creativity and goalscoring danger from midfield. That little Kosovarian Swiss showed us he can fill that gap, when he is in his element. And he was on Saturday!
James Milner: maybe not as involved as in other games recently, but bloody hell! That guy is only 10 years younger than me and he looks 20! Obviously that says a lot about me, but certainly about him, to be honest. What! A! Man!
The rest of the squad were decent (Alisson, Robbo, van Dijk, Lovren (despite some scary moments), Hendo, Gini (who had a good second half, I think), Salah (slightly growing to his best form again and scoring the winning goal: all I’m asking for right now!)) or avarage (Sturridge (worked hard, but still lacking fitness to play the full 90 minutes) and Lallana (can’t really blame him, he hardly played football over the last year)).
Far from our best, agree! But even than we are winning those type of games. Should be scary for the rest of the PL once this team is getting back to its best form, isn’t it?
Up the Reds!