I HAVEN’T read Neil’s match report yet. If you haven’t either, I’ll warn you that he went down there with Rob Gutmann, which probably meant setting off about Thursday and drinking heavily throughout. So no doubt it will be even more romantic and nonsensical than normal. Anyway, we’ve decided to have a crack at match ratings now too. Please let me know if I have got them wrong below. I’ll be really, really interested. All out of ten.
SIMON MIGNOLET: 8
https://twitter.com/Andrew_Heaton/status/569563729500741634
LAD!!!!!!!!! Good save among all the melee of the one that was a pen and nice hands off that free kick too. Punching and kicking weren’t always the best, but coming for them isn’t he?
DEJAN LOVREN: 4.74
Yeah. He recovered well second half, I suppose. In that he didn’t get sent off and I assumed he would. Fell over and won a tackle. Which is better than falling over and not. Can’t have been easy getting booed at work like. Gareth Roberts is booing me as I type and I’m producing THIS as a result.
MARTIN SKRTEL: 9
He had to contend with Lovren to the right and Emre Can’s face to the left and he still managed to remain focussed. Won a ton of headers and looked calm throughout. Excellent top button up work in the post match interview as well. Was WEARING that third kit. Man of the match.
EMRE CAN: 6.5
Did alright didn’t he? He was probably dreading days like this when he was asked to play centre half, so he comes out with credit. Couldn’t decide between a 6 or a 7, so gave him a 6.5. Because that’s in the middle #maths
JORDON IBE: 7
Statistics show it is 80% more likely to rain in the Championship than the Premier League, so it should be no surprise he took to the rain like a duck to, er, rain. Impresses every week, and should improve even more now everyone has learned to spell (and say) his name.
LAZAR MARKOVIC: 4
Me and the wife stayed in Shropshire last night. This morning we went to a place called Ludlow. It seemed very nice but it was raining so we basically just trundled round for 10 minutes, looked at each other, and drove home. Then five hours later I watcher Markovic do the same. Fair play, lad. Crap the rain isn’t it? Got the most meaningless assist since whoever passed to Maradona in 1986.
JOE ALLEN: 6
Should have given a penalty away. Gave away a few kicks. But did some good stuff, too. Oh I don’t know, I’m bored writing this already, Joe.
JORDAN HENDERSON: 6
Was a bit too keen to find the killer ball from midfield at times when we could have done with keeping hold of it. But there were a few of them knocking about. His record as captain must be phenomenal, it must be said. Someone will be tweeting it somewhere.
Jordan Henderson as a captain. 9 games. 7 wins. 2 draws.
— SH (@Sennesation) February 22, 2015
ADAM LALLANA: 3
Had a bit of a cry in the week about how hard it was all going to be and then didn’t turn up. Sound, mate. Just let us know when you are ready to play down there and until then we’ll drop you at Alton Towers on the way down and pick you up on the way back.
PHILIPPE COUTINHO: 8
Wellied the ball in the goal. Actually he didn’t. It was with his instep which makes it even more remarkable. Found some good spaces after that but couldn’t always get his passing going. But he’s great isn’t he?
RAHEEM STERLING: 6.2
Found it hard to get in the game but it’s a bit of a thankless task playing up front on your own when the opposition have much more of the ball. Especially when you don’t exactly have a target man build. Looked far happier when Sturridge came on. But then didn’t we all? Was rewarded for his work for the team with a goal
SUBS
ALBERTO MORENO: 6
Came on at half time and made us look much more solid. Did well, and then a bit rubbish for the goal.
DANIEL STURRIDGE: 5
Reminds of when you watch Forrest Gump and he’s just had his leg braces took off. You know he is going to be boss at running soon, but for a while you have to watch him stumbling about like he’s forgotten what to do. This is that bit. Next week, Touchdown.
GLEN JOHNSON: 5
Came on and got injured. But then came back on again. Warrior.
#WTRWWAW
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Pics: David Rawcliffe-Propaganda
Haha, good review! I’d pretty much agree. I think I’d bump one or two of them up one point but I’d concede that would take them into a contentious area.
I’m sick of this Joe Allen propaganda ;)
Ha ha
Is that referring to my comment? Bless! Funny how he got a 6 on here, yet was labelled brilliant.
You think it’s funny that different people have different opinions? How odd
Completely disagree about Dejan Lovren, was a 4.73
Not bad for you lad, Some sense in there. Mignolet was good, Moreno did really well. How was glamping in Shropshire? Posh toe rag.
Great article!
Lovrens game today had the look of Mignolet’s first game back against Burnley, quite a few issues that worried us but he grew strong from there. I’m hoping for the same for Lovren, otherwise spot on rating for him 4.75
The Maradona line is very good.
So I listened to the first half on the radio and the Claridge/Green axis had nothing good to say about the Reds other than Coutinho & Mignolet. I got home in time to watch second half & seemed like a much tighter performance than was inferred on the radio. Claridge hates the Reds defensively, I remember him completely ripping us apart at Cardiff last year. As I see it, 100% effort, young determined team, quality could have been better but conditions were appalling & 3 points in the bag. As you say John #WTRWWAW
Love this John! Think you might’ve hit on something here with the more lighthearted match ratings idea.
Brilliant. Except redistribute Lovren’s points to those who bailed him out all day long. Then take a couple more off. Then we’re there.
Good job John. keep blowing your trumpet. (An attempt at whit not an insult)
Whatever the team scores it was a good hard British game of football (without the mud) rain lashing down, frantic pace, tackles, contentious issues from pasionate fans and goals (one of them in for goal of the season I reckon). Loved it but couldn’t eat my tea after watching. Well done
Quality stuff. I just love TAW. I’ll buy you a pint
That Markovic review is genius, John.
How Skrtel didn’t get MoTM is a travesty.
He won his battles, cleared up behind others and was immense.
One of the best centre back performances I’ve seen for a while.
He did get it?
He also needlessly tried to head a ball that Can was already going for leaving a massive hole dead center in our area which led to Allen’s somehow-not-a-pen tackle and Migs made a top save (with an outstretched foot) in that very play moments after the incident which proved a game-changer.
Skrtel was shaky like everyone else but became immense while Migs was composed and decisive from the off, which is why he shades MOTM for me.
An extremely amusing if rather harsh assessment of Lallana. I don’t know if it’s because I just split up with my girlfriend, but I actually felt sorry for him.
For about 5 minutes, until I saw how little we were gonna get out of him. I said on Twitter he was passing on the B of the boo, but that wasn’t the problem. He pulled out of every single 50/50 seemingly scared of the abuse getting worse.
It was a risk from Brendan that he’d be able to rise above it, but he never looked like he could ignore it like Lovren did (about all he did do). Our boss does like to test them, and this was a mental test Lallana failed.
Remember Adam, don’t let them see you’re hurting!
I really enjoyed this! Light hearted and funny. Exactly what a player ratings piece should be. I never read an article with player ratings because they are always nonsense. This I really enjoyed.
This is a terrific sequel to the match report that Atko started late last season and that is now shared among the TAW writers.
Gonna be tough to top Gibbo after this one above…
#WTRWWAW
How can you be part of a back three, get pummelled for nearly an hour, come away with a cleansheet and get less than a five? Can and Sakho have done well until now but the last couple of games they’ve played they’ve each looked like they have a ricket in them. Lovren wasn’t perfect today but for his first start in the back three and against a quality side he did more than okay…and I wasn’t shiting myself every time he got the ball, either.
You’ll be ecstatic to know the rest of your scores have my qualified approval.
Wasn’t his first start in the 3 and John was generous
Thanks for the giggles, John. <3
I think Lovren done ok and I weren’t into Joe Allen today but by and large, pretty much spot on.
John, I’m a huge fan of you on the podcast and think you talk a lot of sense, but on what planet does Ibe get a 7 in that game and Joe Allen (our best player along with Skrtel IMO) only a 6?
I love Ibe since he’s come back from Derby and the kid is obviously going to be massive for us, but I think that the fact that he’s 19 sometimes means people say he plays well even when he doesn’t.
Agree on Lovren.
Joe Allen is a strange one isn’t he. Seems to divide opinion like no other in the squad. From what I saw Southampton had the lions share of possession in the game. I was looking for Allen (and Henderson) to get a grip on it, but it never seemed to happen. But Neil agrees with you anyway!
On Ibe, you may be right that the surprise in how quickly he has been able to settle and contribute has led to many of us be more positive about him than we would another player we expect more of. I thought it was a very mature performance though, especially off the ball.
Fair play getting back to my comment John. And I definitely know what you mean about Allen. I’ve been on the verge of writing him off more than once since he’s been here. I don’t think he’s ever going to properly dominate a midfield, but over time I’ve made peace with that fact. As long as he does a passable Lucas impersonation – which he did the other day – being in the right place to break up attacks and keep it moving relatively quickly, then I’ll be happy enough.
And with Ibe, I suppose we might as well get carried away with him now – there could come a time in not too long where there won’t even be a novelty to him playing brilliantly – it’ll just be the norm.
Lallana was just trying too hard rather than play his own game. Guess given the pre match comments we should have seen it coming.
I still don’t understand why Can was switched to accommodate Lovren? We just made both positions worse!
Joe Allen was huge for us yesterday, keep breaking the play up, kept linking the play. His best performance for a long time if not his best in a red (/red & black and grey with a collar and a yellow button) shirt. Up there with Skrtel for MoM.
That opening goal was just unbelievable, I had to rewind it on Sky+ and do the slo-mo thing again, no keeper on earth could keep that one out
Think the Lovren one was harsh and also think Skrtel was at fault for the second penalty claim. Allen thought he played well but was lucky with the pen. Wouldn’t have given all of them Ours and the Allen one though I would have. But seen games where all of those would have been given by one ref or another. Despite the fact he has shit on us a few occasions Friend’s piss poor reffing helped us out for once.
Anyone else getting a bit fed up with Lallana?
He seems to get away with walking around Cryuff turning until he loses the ball or falls over.
Somehow he’s the one summer signing who never gets any stick, especially from the muppets with the microphones.
He’s a midtable player who’s out of his depth at a top team. Lacks top end talent and is mentally weak. Terrible way to spend 25mil. Gets away with it because Lovren has been awful and Rodgers continues to slag off Mario.